StemCell Therapy

There are more than 10 million people in the UK living with arthritis. For many, symptoms start to develop in their 40s, which can have a huge impact on family life, especially if theyre a parent. The toughest thing about being a parent with arthritis, says mother-of-two Charlotte Woodward, is being forced to let someone else do your job. When my children want to do something high energy and I cant do it, I have to sit back and let somebody else take over, she explains. Thats hard, watching someone else do what I should be doing with them.

Charlotte, 29, was diagnosed with juvenile idiopathic arthritis at the age of just 18 months. Ive lived with it ever since, she says, and its just getting worse. I have arthritis in every joint in my body. The pain is constant, really I dont get much relief from it.

That pain, together with problems she has with movement and the fatigue she suffers due to the illness and her medication, has a huge impact on family life with her six-year-old daughter, Lexie, and two-year-old son, Theo.

Theo wants to be picked up all the time and I cant do it, Charlotte explains. Things like making dinner, sometimes it has to be something easy like a bowl of cereal because I cant make them [anything else]. I have to put on a brave face for them. You know you have to keep going because youre their mother and they need you, but at the same time you just want to rest.

The effect of arthritis on family life is often overlooked, but it takes a significant physical and emotional toll on relationships. Be that from pain or mobility problems that stop parents and grandparents being as active as they want to with toddlers and children, to the side effects of certain medication affecting family planning.

According to research from Arthritis Research UK, more than half of respondents (53%) say that they felt like they were a nuisance to their family. While a study conducted by Revealing Reality for Arthritis Research UK found more than a quarter (28%) of people living with arthritis say the condition had a negative impact on physical intimacy with their partner.

Father-of-three Jamie Wakeman, 32, says his wife has been amazing in the face of his diagnoses of osteoarthritis three years ago and then rheumatoid arthritis 18 months later. If we didnt have such a good marriage its hard to see how we would get through, he says. For six to nine months she was having to get me up out of bed in the morning: she was dressing me, getting me something to eat, and sorting out my drugs so I could go to work that day. Weve been together years and shes seen me change massively.

Jamie was once a fanatical sportsman, enjoying football, running, cycling and swimming. Now all of that activity has stopped, he says. It completely changes your relationship with [your children] when theyre so young. Especially the boys, playing football and those types of activities I cant really walk more than a couple of hundred yards without being in a lot of pain.

It takes over every element of your kids and your wifes lives, because everything is determined by how I feel.

Jamies wife, Hayley Wakeman, 32, agrees his condition has changed their familys lives massively. Day to day, going out is a no go a lot of the time because he cant walk, she says. Or I have to leave him at home while I do stuff with the kids, so theyre not missing out. So it has been quite tough.

She adds: Ive had quite a lot of trouble mentally we both have struggled a bit. Theres been a lot of tears, but I think were getting there with it now.

Jamie can be up during the night with the pain, she says, and sometimes works early shifts, which means hes up at 3am and may need help to get dressed. Then shell go back to sleep for a couple of hours before getting up to get the three children to school and herself to work. It has made us stronger in one sense, but some days are hard, especially when youre tired, she says.

Its a bit of grief. Youve lost your husband in one sense. Hes gone from being a fitness fanatic doing triathlons and football and running most nights to basically being sat on the sofa and struggling to move.

For Julie Hutchins, 56, whos had osteoarthritis for around 10 years, the impact is wide-ranging. She has grandchildren aged seven, three and one, and had to give up looking after the eldest one because of arthritis.

It was OK when he was really tiny, but as soon as he got a bit older and I had to bend down to pick him up, or get on the floor, it just became impossible, she says. I was just really upset because I enjoyed doing it.

She feels bad too that shes not able to share as much as she once could with her husband. Were both the same age, but hes obviously a lot fitter than me, Julie says. I feel like Im holding him back all the time. I try to do things but then I suffer the next day.

Olivia Belle, director of external affairs at Arthritis Research UK, says: The impact arthritis has on family life can be enormous. It takes away from those day-to-day moments in family life that so many of us take for granted, not just from those with arthritis but their families as well. We want society to recognise the real impact that arthritis has on every one of us so that no family loses out to the condition.

More here:
'I feel like I'm holding my husband back': the hidden impact of arthritis on families - The Guardian

This entry was posted on August 14, 2017 at 6:41 pm and is filed under Arthritis. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed. |